Nothing on the Horizon

I'm sad to report that house hunting isn't going well. I've talked to a few people about the area I want to move to and they've all said the same thing: it's a great neighborhood, I would thoroughly enjoy living there and good luck finding a house in my price range. It's a strange area, indeed. Most homes are either million-dollar mansions or complete gut jobs in scary places. The precious few middle-of-the-road gems that I would be interested in rarely come on the market and when they do, you have to be ready to pounce. 

My legs are sore from being in this crouching position for so long.

I have started to overthink this (imagine that) and wonder if I'm being given a sign that maybe this particular move isn't for me. Maybe I'm meant to move but not where I thought. I'm trying to remain open and receptive but at the same time, not give up hope. It's a thin line I walk. 

How do you know when to hang in there and when to let go of a dream? It's a question I've never been able to answer gracefully and with full commitment. Have you any advice?

To Do and Ta Da

And just like that, the first half of the year is over. 

I'm taking stock today of what I have left to do in 2011 and figuring out where to focus my energy now. It is a good time to reenergize and prioritize and determine to make the next half even better than the first. It feels like there is so much left to do.

To Do 

• Find a realtor. I want to find someone who knows the area I am thinking of buying in because while I want to find a house I love, I also want to find a house that will be a good investment. This has been a bigger struggle than I imagined it would be but I have some new ideas to try later today. Hopefully I can check this off within the next few weeks.
• Continue eliminating possessions. I have gone through every closet, drawer and cabinet but I can do that again. The clearer the vision of my new house becomes, the easier it is to look at something and know if it will or will not work in the new space. I would like to get rid of 90% of my furniture, too, but that will have to wait until after the house is sold, I'm afraid. I need it for staging the house for potential buyers. (But if any family members or lovely locals need furniture, I can probably hook you up in a few months.) 
• Start packing the non-essentials. Last month I happened across an ad on our company's notice board that a fellow employee had moving boxes to sell. I now have a huge stack of boxes and five boxes of packing paper sitting in my garage, waiting for their next gig. 
• Sell, buy, pack, move and unpack. Seems easy enough, eh? Good golly, Molly.
• Incorporate a regular exercise routine. While I have been eating really well and exercising a time or two a week, I really need to step it up. This whole moving situation is going to be stressful, work isn't getting any less so, and I'm going to need a consistent exercise regime to help me face each day. I am worth it.
• Start accepting those social invitations. Ugh, let's not even talk about it. It might take me another month or two to brave this one. Talk about stress.

But as a good friend told me the other day, I can't just focus on what is left to do. I need to also take a moment to celebrate all that has been accomplished. And, go me, I have done a lot of what I intended to do this year already and my touchstone word INVEST has been at the heart of it all.

Ta Da

• Find creativity inspiration. Oh my stars. I have spent countless hours in writing, photography and painting courses the past six months. I have loved learning the technical aspects as well as just letting go and playing. It's been great. And I have more photography workshops and writing fun lined up for the last half of the year, too.
• Prepare the house for sale. Done, inside and out. And it feels good. You should see the perennials outside my front door. And my new kitchen counter. Gorgeous. 
• Pare down the possessions.  I used to need two closets to hold all my clothes. Now everything is hanging in 3/4 of one… and that's summer and winter clothes! I've taken so many boxes and bags of books, tchotchkes and dishes to Goodwill, the volunteers there know more about me than you do. The sense of freedom and light that comes from a good unburdening is immense. I highly recommend it.
• Focus on healthy living. I wanted to adopt a more holistic approach to living this year and I'm making progress. I did everything from taking up yoga and Tai Chi to packing a healthy lunch for work every day the past six months. I also wanted to do something about my sleep issues and attended a sleep seminar (sponsored through work) to learn what I needed to change to get more rest. I bought light-eliminating shades for the bedroom, started running a fan for white noise (and to keep the room cool for the best sleep) and started meditating before I turned in. Though it took a few weeks to readjust, I am happy to say I'm sleeping again. I feel great. 

How about you, dear reader? Have you made changes this year? Have changes you'd like to make? I would love to hear about them and cheer you on. 

Happy July and the best of 2011 to you.

Renovations Initiated

The man who will be making a few updates and repairs to my home so I can put it on the market was here last night. I had walked through each room and around the property a few days ago so I had a list of things for us to discuss so he can provide quotes on the work. The meeting went extremely well, I thought. He didn't blink at anything I was asking him to do (nothing seemed daunting or too menial for him, which I appreciated) and he gave some good advice when I asked questions. He was referred to me by three people, all of whom rave about the quality of his work, his efficiency and prices so I'm quite pleased to have found him and that he has time to work with me.

What I'm not quite so pleased with is the list of things that I wanted fixed or updated. A few of the things, like a new dining room light fixture, to name a ridiculously simple example, were things I have NEVER liked about my house and yet, I've lived with them for twelve years. Why? And why, now that I'm selling, am I determined that the new buyer will have a nicer chandelier than I did? 

I was talking to a friend yesterday who is also preparing his home for sale this year. He said he and his wife had similar revelations. Why had they lived with mediocre bathrooms all these years and now that they were selling were they renovating them for the buyers? Hadn't they deserved nicer bathrooms? 

Does that sound as ridiculous to you as it has to us? 

I've made a vow that if I do find a new home that it will be designed and renovated to suit my tastes and needs as quickly as I can make it happen. (Having this fantastic new contractor will certainly help me this time.) Our homes should be reflections of us and make us feel our best. The person who pays the mortgage deserves at least that much.

What about you? Have you something in your home that you've always meant or wanted to change and have never gotten around to it? What's stopping you? Do you think you might take steps to change it now? I sincerely hope so. 

Feeling At Home

My 'regular' at the coffee shop: cinnamon-orange decaf teaI've spent part of every weekend since early November in the neighborhood I'm considering moving to. I've been feeling my way around, driving up and down streets, looking at houses, checking out the locals, walking through the parks. You might say I've been trying out the town to see if it fits and how comfortable it is. The place is winning me over in a big way. 

The owners and managers of the shops I've been in have introduced themselves to me and been so friendly, every time I go to the coffee shop someone engages me in conversation and I even went so far as to join a writers' group that meets at the local independent bookstore.  

I'm sort of moving in without the hassle of cardboard boxes and packing tape. 

Last weekend, I spent the entire afternoon there, enjoying the Christmas Walk in the downtown area. Most of the shops were open, which was a treat because they aren't normally open on Sundays. Everyone was offering specials and sales and free hot drinks and there were singers serenading everyone with Christmas carols on the sidewalk. A horse-drawn trolley took children to see Santa and Mrs. Claus and then everyone gathered at the park to hear Christmas carols by the church choir and watch Santa light the 30' pine in the center of the plaza. And even though it was an all-day event sponsored and primarily attended by the residents of the community, I was welcomed and taken in as though I belonged. It is so unlike the town I live in now, it's hard to describe. I've never felt quite so at home in a place so unfamiliar. It's amazing.

BeforeAfter

Looking for a Hug

When I moved into this home eleven years ago, it felt like me. It probably sounds ridiculous but the moment I stepped over the threshold the first time, it felt like the house hugged me. I knew I was going to buy it at that moment, before even seeing the rest of it. Thankfully, I loved everything about it, from it's angled walls and vaulted ceilings to its dark cherry cabinetry and curved staircase. Everyone who came over said the same thing, "It looks like you, Debra." 

I'm not going to say that the decision to buy this house was completely emotional because it wasn't. I also knew it was going to be a good investment. It has a two car attached garage, three bedrooms and two and a half baths so it is a perfect size for a range of buyers. It's also in a good location in a town known for the quality of its schools and affluent community. When I refinanced this year, the appraisal showed I had been right so yay, let's hear it for increased equity.

However, while I still love my place, it hasn't felt so much like me in recent years. I've been wrestling with moving for quite a while. Part of me wants to sell everything, quit my job and move to... and that's where I get stuck. Move to the mountains? The ocean? The city? They all sound equally appealing depending on my mood that day. And what about a job? I could quit my job and hope to find something in a place I would love to live which would most likely mean significantly less pay in a higher cost of living area. So, yeah. I had better love that new job because it would be the only thing I could afford to do.  I've looked for jobs within the company in many different locations but I'm either too far up the salary grade ladder or, you know, not an engineer, so the jobs options are slim the farther you get from headquarters. 

Or, my other option, and the one I'm favoring now, is to continue to live and work here so I can afford to do all the things I love to do... like weekends in Chicago and trips to Maine and the UK and whatever else I care to do. It just seems to make the most sense, financially and personally.

However, there's still the matter of this house and feeling the need to move. So, I think I've found a great compromise. There is a place here locally that I would love to move to. I've always gotten a great vibe from the neighborhood and last weekend I was able to spend several hours in one of the local businesses and actually witness the interactions of community members. It reminded me exactly of one of the Chicago neighborhoods that I love to visit. It has some beautiful little bungalows with wooden floors, dormer windows and enough character to keep me entranced for a long time and it has everything within walking distance that you could possibly need... restaurants, shopping, library, bookstore, grocery, drugstore... just like a city neighborhood. 

Now I just need to find a realtor and start seriously looking at homes. I don't have a pressing need to move so I should be able to take my time and find that perfect little cottage that will feel like the me I've become. And as crazy as it sounds, I'll know it's the one if I walk across the threshold and it hugs me. I can't wait to find it.